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The Black Dog

That bloody dog is at my heels again. I can feel its breath, sense rather than hear the heavy thud of its paws as it feeds on my shadow and grows bigger, stronger.
I try hard not to feed it, not to tempt it closer with those intrusive thoughts or the automatic negative thoughts which move in waves – waxing and waning like the tides. 

I want to write a blog. I’d love to review a game or share something amazing with you but instead I am preoccupied with that bloody hound. 

I started this blog last week but of course my visitor meant that I was robbed of the power or will to actually finish it, let alone publish it.

This is not one coherent blog post, rather, it is a collection of snippets glimpses of how it feels for me. It’s self indulgent, I think. I don’t know, I can’t tell at the moment. And, that’s part of the problem – this paralysing mind fog. What would my best friend say? It might help people – reassure them; it might help you to share it; it might help people who don’t have mental health issues understand a bit more. 

But, on those days being my own best friend is an impossible task. My best friend on these days thinks the kindest thing is just to be brutally honest, to prepare me for the worst and prevent future embarrassment by discouraging human contact. Even the cat doesn’t care. She knows I’m a selfish bitch who deserves awful things. The way she speaks to me – even I know that no-one should have to put up with that. 

I realise I sound insane but that’s because I am. A bit. Fortunately most days I’m blessed with sharp wits and humour and I can shut her up. I can’t get rid of her completely though. Mostly I am alright…mainly… 

But I digress. I bore you. 

Snippets…

I lay in bed this morning after I’d dropped the kids off and stared at the expanse of grey sky, broken up by wet rooftops and bare trees. I think about things I should do. I scold myself for saying should – it’s really unhelpful language. I shouldn’t use it. My list flitters round my head and in amongst the list flicker answers, advice, strategies I *should* be using. There’s that damned word again. But it is all too hard to grasp and while I try to capture a thought I realise it’s too late and the black dog is on me. I sleep and when I wake, I feel fleetingly better until I realise how much time I’ve wasted. 

***

Today the insanity was palpable; a grey blanket which scratched at my skin, covered my head, made breathing stilted, shallow. I retreated into the darkness and smallness of it. Trying to catch myself, I lifted it and looked out at the sky. The measurelessness of it winded me; left me gasping for breath; floundering, drowning in open blue space. 

My body drifted through time and space confined by the madness which remained all day as a stone, lodged in my throat threatening to choke me at any moment. 

***

I do sink. From the heady heights of manic anxiety straight down to the paralysis of depression. Pausing only briefly to fasten my seatbelt in the car outside wraparound club and to feel happy. Momentarily I am happy and grateful for happy children and feeling love. By the time I reach work – a scant, blank 3 minute drive – I have plummeted into depression.

***

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Zombies!!! The Game.

If you’ve perused my games menu, you may have noticed that I have a penchant for Zombie games! From a young age (probably too young) I enjoyed watching all sorts of horror films. With the exception of a few well made favourites like The Exorcist, The Shining and Don’t Look Back, I have favoured trash or ridiculous storylines which zombie films have in abundance. I enjoyed Black Sheep (a film about zombie sheep in New Zealand – a twist on the 5 people get stuck in a cabin in the middle of nowhere trope), Dead Snow (nazi zombies who meet a sticky end, also involving a cabin – this time in the wilds of Norway) and of course, Shaun of the Dead.
 
Shaun of the Dead is one of my favourite films. It’s more than just a pun, it’s a brilliantly funny film. It was also, among other things, a reference to this in my online dating profile that encouraged my partner to contact me. So it has a very special place in my heart.
 
And Zombie films are not just important in my life, they have persisted in our culture for years. Since Romero’s Night of the Living Dead in 1968 the zombie trope has been ever present. It’s curious because as the easy satire of Shaun of the Dead highlights, the stories are similar, the characters fall into predictable roles with predictable behaviours and yet it is still a popular (if niche) genre. The films have often been used as a comment on consumerism and modern life; I wonder whether that is part of their timeless appeal. The comments Romero was making back then are still just as relevant today. Consumerism, the ethics of it and its role in our lives still preoccupies many people.
 
Zombies themselves have a special appeal. Shaun of the Dead even ends with people keeping zombies as companions – like a dog but a bit bite-ier! Their slow movements and blank faces make us feel we can definitely triumph in a battle against them. Perhaps the promise of a victory which would save humanity, alongside the glory which would accompany it, appeals to our heroic (while slightly cowardly) side.
 
And when (not if!) the zombie apocalypse comes will you be ready for it? I have had many discussions about plans for the zombie apocalypse and where would be a suitable place to fight them from. I knew someone who said she wouldn’t go out with anyone if they didn’t have a zombie apocalypse plan. When you’re down the Winchester, having a pint and waiting for it all to blow over, you just need to hope Cards or Die are there with what is becoming an extensive selection of zombie games to help you come up with some strategies!
 
When I saw Zombies by Todd Breitenstein for just £2.99 in a charity shop I wondered straightaway if it was a bargain or a dud. I’d never heard of it and it was still shrink wrapped. Inside the box there were 100 tiny, plastic zombies and that was ultimately what swung it for me! I mean you can never have too many tiny plastic zombies and until now I didn’t have any. It was packaged like a video which had confused both the person labelling the game and the lady on the till and was boldly labelled ‘This one’s a no-brainer’ so I brought it home with me.
In Zombies you win by being the first to either defeat 25 zombies or reach the helipad and escape. The mechanism for adding zombies is very easy: for named buildings it is written on the card and for other cards you just place the same number of zombies as there are roads. You move by rolling a die, pausing to battle zombies by rolling a die, then you move the zombies by… you guessed it… rolling a die. Every turn you place a tile making sure all roads join other roads, if you place enough dead ends then you can not escape and must continue until one of you has defeated 25 zombies.
At this point, I felt that it was going to be a glorified roll and move game, entirely down to chance. Actually, there is more to it. And I don’t mean the teeny weeny zombies although I’ll be honest, they have swayed me.
There are other elements too – bullets which can be used to boost your die score, 3 hearts which represent your lives and are used to continue fighting a zombie. More of both of these can be collected as you move around the board, placing you in a stronger position to fight. You can move zombies at the end of your turn – this is again dependent on a die roll. At this point you can move zombies towards you or towards your opponent.
 
There is an element of push your luck here too. If you choose to fight while you are low on life and bullets you can find yourself back at the start. You respawn with 3 bullets and 3 lives but you lose half the zombies you defeated. And to add insult to injury you round up! So if for instance someone (it could be anyone) had 15 zombies, 1 life and 1 bullet and she thought ‘Ha! I’m invincible- I laugh in the face of death’ then died, she would lose 8 hard earned zombies which seems distinctly unfair. Especially as the dice that come with it are rubbish and only roll 1s.
 
There are also event cards. You start with three and can play them at any point in the game – using them to bolster your plans or scupper your opponent’s. The ability to discard unwanted cards at the end of your turn means you can get rid of cards that don’t fit with your strategy. I say strategy, it’s more Go For Broke than Go! But there is enough strategy to maintain interest and the cards add to the fun. For instance ‘we’re screwed’ or more accurately ‘You’re screwed, I’m winning now!’
We really enjoyed it and while we were playing the bar man came over and said they have it at home and often play. It turns out loads of people have it and enjoy it. It was just a well kept secret… until now….
 
Throughout the game you must weigh up whether you are strong enough to battle or whether you should try to avoid the zombies and make for the helipad, collecting hearts and bullets as you go. Sacrifice the right event cards to collect more useful ones and you might just make it, or at the very least put up a good fight. And when it’s all over you can still enjoy a pint and a toastie down the Winchester, hopefully none the worse for your adventures.
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Magic Maze, and team building without having to talk to anyone.

We all love work don’t we, and what do we love more than work? A training day. And the best type of training day? Joy of joys – a team building day. Well, what if I told you that for part of your team building day you can’t talk to your colleagues? If, like me you prefer to work in splendid isolation then this may be the team building day for you!
 
Cooperative gaming is all about working together as a team to overcome adversity or challenge. A kind of all for one and one for all mentality. You need to strategise and move as a team to survive. But in these silent games communication is no longer enough -you have to engage your empathy. No-one can just take control here and make all the decisions, so you are truly playing as a team.
 
Magic Maze
There are four heroes in Magic Maze: a mage, a barbarian, an elf and a dwarf. Our intrepid heroes must steal a vial, a sword, a bow and an axe respectively before escaping the shopping mall. Yes, that’s right – a shopping mall. Deliciously ridiculous – you must suspend your disbelief before we even start playing.
 
The game has 17 different scenarios and can be played solo or for up to 8 players. I like the fact that scenario 1 allows you to learn the mechanics of the game and as such is not too challenging at all. By scenario 3 you will have learnt all the rules of the game. Learning the rules in stages makes it very accessible.
 
Unlike other games anyone can move the heroes. You are not assigned a particular colour or role, instead you are assigned a movement ability. The cards depict different movements and abilities – North, South, up and down escalators, the ability to travel to vortexes or the ability to reveal and place another tile/ part of the magic maze. You all play at once, there is no turn taking which makes keeping track of where you are up to increasingly challenging.
 
Another unusual feature is the length of time you need to play. The game is played in real time and only takes around 15 minutes. It reminds me of Queen Games’ Escape from Zombie City and Escape the Curse of the Temple – both of which I thoroughly enjoy. There are differences though. The speed of play means you can play a few games of it and you can really feel your team getting better at it the more rounds you play. In common with the Escape games it is an intense experience so 15 minutes is enough for my nerves. After that I need time to regroup, discuss tactics with the team and then we can go again!
 
But of course, the most unusual feature of this game is that it is played in silence. The only way to communicate is to move the large red ‘Do Something Pawn’ in front of a player and look at them pleadingly whilst thinking ‘loudly’.
 
In order to play successfully you need to consider why other people are moving pawns in a particular direction; you need to consider what their strategy is. If everyone or even anyone tries to enforce their own strategy on others your team will fail. Unlike other cooperative games where you can agree strategy and adaptations as you go along in this game you need to observe and adapt on the go. You also need to be aware of what each characters’ abilities are so you know which person needs to move next. It epitomises team work – know the strengths and abilities of your team, be observant, be empathetic and be patient.
There are some opportunities to speak. When you land on a timer (another move that must be carefully activated to give you the maximum chance of triumphing) you may speak until someone moves a pawn. As soon as a piece is moved you must resume the game without speaking. And of course, all the time you are talking time is slipping past before your very eyes!
 
There are two halves to the game. In the first half you must work together to position the heroes so that they can all steal the objects at the same time. But, don’t forget to keep an eye on the timer, as you also need to be able to get a pawn to the timer space so that you can flip it and gain more time. A common tactical error in the first run through of the game.
 
One of the players is able to travel to vortexes which is a handy way to move the heroes to different tiles quickly but don’t get too used to it. In the second half, the vortexes are closed which makes getting around significantly trickier. Then you must work together to escape the mall undetected. As with all great games it is tricky but ultimately achievable and you can increase the difficulty level so that is always true.
 
The ‘Do Something Pawn’ has become something of a bone of contention in our house. I have recently turned the timer on its side in order to pause the game and remind my lovely family that ‘We don’t bang the pawn aggressively in front of one another and we don’t bang it over and over again in front of the same person DO WE?’ That’s right, we do not.
 
When I taught there was a game I played with groups (especially groups who were ‘struggling to bond’ shall we say). You all stand in a circle and you throw the ball round the circle. After you have thrown the ball you sit down. You remember who you threw it to. Then, we time it and you have to try to beat your time. The class have to trust me in order for this to work – even when they don’t trust each other. The second timed attempt – when they are trying to beat their own time is always (ALWAYS) a disaster. They shout at each other, they throw too hard or too high for the kid trying to catch, they are impatient and unforgiving.
 
So, I stop them – we pause. ‘What went wrong?’ I ask. I wait till they have blamed kids who couldn’t catch, kids who dropped the ball. Then I tell them that I did it with other classes who dropped the ball and they did it a lot faster. Then I ask the kids who couldn’t catch it ‘what could we have done differently?’. The answers were always the same – throw it gentler, slower, lower. Throw it to ‘that’ person in a way that ‘they’ can catch. If they drop it, don’t shout. Shouting makes you drop the ball and then fumble it. They work this all out themselves with various degrees of leading from me. Like I said they trusted me – it was a safe environment.
Then, we do it again. The transformation is amazing. They invariably smash their time and they know that everyone is an essential part of that victory. Working as a team is about working with individuals, observing, adapting. Magic Maze reminds me of this experience. Watching people play is magical. As adults we still need reminding of the basic values of teamwork and Magic Maze is a perfectly fun way to do it.
One of the Cards or Die training and team building experiences uses Magic Maze. When we say we offer unique team building packages, we’re not joking!
Board gaming doesn’t get more niche than this! If you enjoy cooperative games then you really need to up the ante and get involved with silent, or limited communication, cooperative games. You might also want to check out Assembly and Get Adler which both limit communication. Cooperative games really test whether you are a lone wolf or a team player – and playing in silence pushes this to the limit.
Join us for a game at a Cards or Die event.
Hearts1914

Jolly and Instructive Games

I love vintage games: the look of them; the language on the box and in the instruction booklet; the fact many others have already loved them. Occasionally you get a glimpse of a certain era not only the game but its accoutrements.
 
As you unpack them for the first time you might remember the scarcity of board games 30, 40 or more years ago. The game you are holding was carefully chosen to join precious other games on a shelf. You can feel that magic, a link to the memories that someone else has cherished.
 
Trek
Trek is a jolly game of mountaineering. Be the first to reach the summit to win. Trek is a delicate balance of resource management and luck. Run out of either supplies or luck and you’re scuppered. You buy resources and as supplies dwindle the price increases. You can gain money as you advance up the mountain but in order to do so you need the correct cards and equipment. This will test your decision making capabilities as well as your luck. Restrictions on the hand limit mean you need to discard cards in order to try to get the one you need but which to discard? There’s the rub! While you are mobilised you are penalised by paying money into the bank thus remaining still for too long diminishes your chances of ever reaching the summit. It’s a clever game: fun and frustrating in equal measure.
I imagine this is a lot like actual mountaineering. I wouldn’t know for sure as there are no mountains in Leeds and I’ve never understood the attraction of risking life and limb to achieve anything. So for me the risk of splashing out on a jeep rather than playing it safe with a donkey is quite sufficient excitement for me.
I discovered it in a charity shop. It was an absolute gem of a find with all the pieces carefully stored and perfectly intact. It had clearly been enjoyed many times and then packed away for a later time that never came.
 
Jolly: rejoice as your opponent watches the card that stands between advance and certain doom cast onto the discard pile.
Instructive: experience the thrills and spills of mountaineering without chewing your own arm off. Or, indeed, having to stand up.
 
Touring England
Like a much simpler version of Ticket to Ride, in Touring England you plan your circular route around England taking in as many cities named on your route as possible. In common with many roll and move games popular in this era, there is not a great deal of strategy involved here. But it is an entirely pleasant game and surprisingly engaging. The version I have is a loyal reprint of the original, complete with a 1930 map of Britain. The art work and cars are charming and evocative of the period, although the original came with tin cars which would be even better. The game is perfect for playing with younger members of the family.
 
Jolly: What could be more jolly than putting the top down on your Roadster, packing a picnic and having a leisurely Sunday drive around England.
Instructive: It’s better than that – it’s educative. Oh, yes – it says so on the box. Perfect for little ones to learn a little English Geography and some bizarre new vocabulary.
Tell Me
The first time I saw Tell Me in a charity shop, I dismissed it. It was plastic and came in a garish 1980s box. It is such a simple premise for a game that having already been put off by the packaging, the modern description didn’t sell it to me at all. Spin the wheel to get a letter, answer a question and the answer must begin with that letter.
 
I should know by now that the box isn’t everything. Don’t Panic is one of my most popular games and the box is awful. But I’m glad I did pass over the plastic monstrosity because the next time I saw it, it was the 1960s version. The box boasts that it is ‘The Grand Quiz Game’. The spinner is tin and the cards, inexplicably, in both French and English.
 
I bought it mainly for the tin spinner and how retro it looked. I wasn’t sure that it was a game that would get any love at all or whether it really was too simple. How wrong I was.
Tell Me is a great party game that any number can play, in teams or individually and as long as you know your letters, you are the right age for it. It requires fast thinking – if you’ve enjoyed Anomia, Don’t Panic or Dobble then you’ll know what utter rubbish one* comes out with when under pressure.
*By one, I mean you but I’m being polite. I’ll even make you feel better by telling you about my recent dim wittery:
I spin the spinner, it lands on Y, I turn over card ‘Musical Instrument’ …”Yazoo” I shout gleefully and take the card.
There is a pause… silence…
Everyone else stares with “What are you on about?” eyes…
My partner, sympathetically removing the card from my hand: “She means Kazoo”
But the next time we got Y, guess what the category was? Drinks! So, the moral of the story is, I’m a winner.
 
Jolly: Mock your friends as they struggle to remember what letter words begin with.
Instructive: Honestly, you’re not going to learn anything new here, but it will make your brain work which is pretty much the same thing. Right?
 
Hearts
Hearts is a game that is almost as pointless as Shut the Box or Yahtzee. And yet, you will pass many hours repeatedly trying to get the right combination of dice – in this case to spell out the word hearts. All of these games are strangely addictive to many relatively sane people.
 
The main charm of hearts lies in its age. This is my oldest game – made in 1914 during World War 1 it speaks to us of a different time. A simpler one in many ways but one fraught with loss. A game of love in a time of national mourning. I always wonder who owned it, perhaps children or a young couple. The dice are faded and worn but still usable. Unless it is a specifically requested game at events it stays at home in it’s own special place on top of the shelves where it won’t get battered or knocked. Over the last 100 years it has been loved. Generations have rolled and re-rolled those dice, determined for them to fall in that winning word.
 
Jolly: It is jolly if you are a lover of the Shut the Box or Yahtzee mechanic: the pretence of strategy as you select which dice will be re-rolled to spell out Hearts.
Instructive: What can we learn here beyond how to spell Hearts? Something about our own addictive nature? Or something less tangible perhaps – a glimpse into a parlour so very long ago where small hands reverently removed the lid and the dice – bright gold letters on a blood red background spilled onto green baize again and again.
Kan-U-Go
This is a childhood favourite. It was one of the few games we owned and one of even fewer games that my Mum would agree to play. Like Scrabble but with cards, you play your cards onto a shared grid making 4 or 5 letter words. There is a solo variant (an essential part of any childhood – I’m making a massive assumption here that even children with siblings close to them in age sometimes just craved solitude). Despite its compact box, to play Kan-U-Go requires a large space so it doesn’t always come out at events. It’s a perfect game to pack for the holidays though.
 
I was surprised when I realised it dates back to 1943. I’m a child of the 70s and had always just assumed it was from that era as it was a popular choice even then.
 
Jolly: this is a very serious word game requiring verbal dexterity and an impressive vocabulary. Until someone plays “knob”.
Instructive: it’s definitely educational. I’ve always been good at spelling and I attribute it to the amount of word games I played as a child. Take it from me, employers don’t want someone who spells knob without its silent k.
Kan-U-Go lived in the cupboard under the stairs with a spring trap game that you removed pieces from without disturbing the other pieces; a copy of Mastermind, Picture Lotto, Perfection, Monopoly and years later a much loved copy of Escape From Atlantis (still one of my prize possessions). Mouse Trap was soon consigned to the attic on the grounds that it took ages and infuriated all of us (more than Monopoly – but that’s another story…)
 
So, if you imagine the shelves of your past, the cupboard under the stairs or the space on top of your childhood wardrobe and the sparse selection of games there – what do you remember? More importantly what did you keep? Or what do you regret losing?
 
Join us for games at a Cards or Die event soon!
 
Masterpiece

The fine art of Board Games

On the 7th and 8th July it is The Horsforth Walk of Art. It will be the first year that Cards or Die have taken part and I couldn’t be more excited. Art is a passion of mine; I don’t visit a city without taking in the art gallery. Some of my favourite places are The Yorkshire Sculpture Park (especially the Deer Shelter), the pre-raphaelites section of Birmingham city art gallery and when I lived in York I used to spend a disproportionate amount of time sitting in front of Sea by David Nash. This passion is evident in my board games collection too – I like the confusing beauty of Dixit; the pleasantly tactile Ticket to Ride and the dark comic book brilliance of Gloom. So we’ll be putting up the gazebos and you’ll have full access to the complete Cards or Die collection! In advance of that, I thought I’d preview some of our more overt art games that you can try at any of our events.
 
Masterpiece – The Classic Art Auction game
1970 Parker Brothers
At the end of the game the winner is the player who has amassed the largest fortune in paintings and cash.
 
This was one of my sister’s favourite games and it turns out there was a copy in the attic of my parents’ house. At an event last year someone requested it and so, as I do, I kept an eye out for it. I finally found a copy in a charity shop in Derby. Last week, I found a copy in the attic. ‘Oh, didn’t you know that was there?’ said my siblings… Proof that siblings can be annoying even when you’re 43. Anyway, I now have two gorgeous copies of this retro classic. And one of them was free. Perfect.
Each player has a value chart and starts with the princely sum of $15million.
You each draw a painting which you display face up in front of you and a value card which you slip under the painting so that no-one can see it.
As you move around the board you complete various actions as you try to add to your starting fortune:
1. Bank Auction – players may bid for the painting displayed on the easel. The highest bidder takes the painting and the top value card. Again, placing the value card under the painting out of sight.
Let’s just pause for a moment to enjoy that… ‘the painting displayed on the easel’. It comes with an easel!! Just me that’s excited..? Ohkay… we’ll move on
2. Private Auction – other players may bid on one of your paintings. Again, the highest bidder wins the painting and the value you had already attached to it. You may also buy from players for a fixed amount.
3. Collect money from the bank or a value card. If you choose a value card you may attach it to the painting of your choice.
4. Buy or sell paintings to the bank.
5. Inherit paintings from the bank vaults.
When the last painting is drawn and the last action completed the game ends and you count up your assets!
 
Like many retro games the premise is simple but it’s an incredibly enjoyable game. The pleasure of conning friends out of imaginary money for the sake of art is almost like a modern work of art in itself. I imagine Damien Hirst could conjure up some sort of installation depicting this very circumstance.
 
Face to Face
2009 Alex Beard – Untamed Games
A cubist strategy game, Face to Face requires you to play a tile from your rack that fits the existing pattern and colour. Game pieces match when they are Eye to Nose, or Nose to Mouth, and of the correct colour. You score at the end of each round and the game ends when a player reaches 100 points. Points are scored based on which pieces your opponent has failed to play.
Unfortunately…
Corners have been cut in the design and printing of the game. The components are not well finished and the design as a strategic game is flawed.
There are some design flaws such as the cutting of the tiles which has left some pieces with extra edges of the wrong colour that you just have to ignore.
 
The tile racks are flimsy and don’t stay upright. They aren’t big enough or strong enough to hold the 11 starting pieces you need. This means that you can’t keep your hand concealed from your opponent. A definite issue if the game is strategic.
 
As new pieces are drawn from a face down pile and the pieces vary in size and shape, you are able to select pieces which are more likely to fit in the available shapes and spaces on the board. This diminishes the strategic element of the game.
 
The restrictions on piece placement mean that the game is reliant on you drawing enough nose pieces and it ends up feeling protracted and imbalanced.
 
On the plus side…
It is an unusual set of game pieces and I mean that in a positive way. The cubist art on them is quirky and effective. The fact that they are varied shapes and sizes is perfect for creating ‘unique cubist compositions’ as it boasts on the box. It seems such a shame to just bin this game off when we could be enjoying the theme of it. You can persevere with the original rules making adjustments to scoring, for example playing to 50 instead of 100. But we decided we would take house rules to another level:
1. Deal out 12 pieces per person face down.
2. Simultaneously all players reveal their pieces.
3. Start building cubist faces. Each face must have: a nose, a mouth and 2 eyes.
Pieces that touch another piece must be matched by colour.
4. When you have used all the pieces that you can, draw 3 more.
5. When the last piece is drawn the winner is the person with the most complete faces.
 
However you choose to play it’s fun to make cubist faces!
 
Picture This
1993 Spears Games
A potentially hilarious mixture of Pictionary and Charades. I say hilarious… equally you could discover that you have the miming skills of Picasso and the drawing abilities of Lionel Blair. Anything could happen! ‘Picture This’ requires you to roll 2 dice. One die dictates whether you mime, draw or choose between them, while the second die determines the category. Categories such as wind instruments, poets and childhood ailments test your skills and your wits!
You create your works of art or your small scale theatrical performances in the allotted time and your team gains points by correctly identifying the category.
Pictionary
An MB classic from 2000.
The family game of quick-draw!
 
Sketch the words that appear on the cards for your teammates to identify. In the time honoured tradition of hilarious games which are improved only by playing them in the pub, you are against the sand timer. So whether you are sketching contact lenses, a relay race or big cheese – you must render your masterpiece quickly and expertly if you are to triumph.
So, whether you want to create your own masterpiece or try your luck at the auction house, come and visit us on the walk of art – or anytime and have a go!
 
Come along to a Cards or Die event.
 
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Why Cards or Die?
The naming of businesses.

Writing a blog always feels, at best a little self indulgent and at worst self obsessed. One of the first things people often ask about the business is ‘Why Cards or Die?’ so I thought I would write something down. And, while I wrangle with my anxiety and self doubt, feel free to read this, ponder or disregard it!
The naming of a business is a big deal. This is the first thing people see or hear of you. What was that trite 80s Head and Shoulders strapline? “You never get a second chance to make a first impression”. All the great bloggers and gurus find inspirational quotations from 80s commercials – as well as solutions to dandruff issues. In choosing a name we must consider what impression we are making: does it communicate what we do? what we are about?
 
I chose Cards or Die primarily because I love a pun. I’m a big fan of a Stalybridge beauty salon called “Tanz’In’Ere”, a Leeds pet shop called “Tyrannosaurus Pets” and the newest addition to Horsforth High Street – a wine shop called “Once Upon a Vine”. I appreciate (now) that there is more to naming a business than choosing a great pun. I hope that a pun communicates something lighthearted and fun. My business is all about connecting people, bringing them together to have fun.
 
The particular pun I chose was characteristically dark; listening to The Smiths on repeat for years leaves its mark. My two standard responses to “Why do you wear so much black?” are (a) It matches my soul or (b) because black is how I feel on the inside. In 15 years of teaching only one teenager ever got the reference. She replied “Cool, you like The Smiths” and presumably made a mental note never to ask me anything ever again.
 
And I suppose therein lies another facet of my character. My dry, dark sense of humour doesn’t always translate and I often don’t care – as long as I’m amusing myself that’s all that counts. Except when naming a business, then other people’s responses are paramount.
 
It was only retrospectively that I learnt that hardly anyone knows that the word dice is plural while die is singular. I had assumed this was common knowledge. It is not. In fact one kind soul took it upon himself to explain to me that I had named the business ‘wrong’. Oh, what it must be like to have that level of confidence!
 
I like the name and I’m keeping it. Partly because once you make that commitment and start building a brand that people are familiar with it’s best to stick with it. Unless of course you realise that the car you named a Mitsubishi Pajero means wanker or Ford Pinto means small penis. In that case you should definitely go for a rename! Another reason I am so invested in the name is that I commissioned a song by Jonathan Mann (I always intend to do loads of stuff on youtube and it will be great as a theme for videos at some point – anxiety allowing).
Another reason I really like Cards or Die is because I’ve enjoyed designing the logo and the realisation that it’s easy to adapt to suit different seasons or events means I am having a lot of fun with it.
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Logo Black Silver Crop
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Easter Logo
I feel like even if you miss the pun at least you know I’m passionate about games! But in a kind of “do what I say not what I did” fashion, I would advise you to always research thoroughly. In a similar vein here are some questions I should have mulled over when naming the business:
  • what do I want to say?
  • what do I want people to know?
  • what is the core ethos of my business?
  • is the name memorable?
  • is the name ambiguous in any way?
  • what impression does it create of me/ my brand?
Address these questions and you are well on your way to developing a brand. All you have to do is come up with a punny name!
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Forest of Fate: choose your own demise.

Do you fondly remember Choose Your Own Adventure Books? Fighting Fantasy? I’m sure I even got one free with my weetabix in the 80s, and I loved it.
If these hold fond memories for you, then Forest of Fate is the perfect game for you. Passionate about Role Playing Games and want to introduce non-gamers to your passion? -look no further. Love a gripping story and fabulous artwork in your game – you need this in your life. Don’t value your life, your face or your vital organs? – this was made especially for you.
The first thing I loved about this game was the artwork. It is a visually stunning game and the fact that the cards match the background on the relevant computer page is a brilliant detail. But it’s not just about looks; so far I have introduced it to children from 7 to 13 and several adults too. All of whom have thoroughly enjoyed it.
 
The Game – A summary
In Forest of Fate, you navigate a random series of encounters in order to complete your quest, hopefully returning home to brag of your conquests. Upon revealing an encounter, your intrepid band of ne’erdowells must decide which of you is best placed to tackle the challenge. Wow the wolves with your dazzling style; beguile the ferryman or use epic force to disarm the sword expert.
 
Successful challenges are rewarded with items or artefacts that can support you on your perilous journey through the dark forest. But fail and the penalties are high (and honestly – quite gruesome – this is not a quest for the faint-hearted). A tree branch through the abdomen, brutally beaten by a band of thieves or breaking your ankle in dense fog are some of the fates that await the careless. In other words, you sustain heavy life point losses. You can lose 6 points in one go if the Forest Gods are not on your side.
 
Skills and Abilities
All the expected skills are there to choose from: wits, care, speed, force and guile. And the addition of style as a skill is very enjoyable – by using style, you can “dazzle, seduce or bemuse”.
 
There are six characters to choose between. The ambiguous images, coupled with the necessary use of second person in the story telling means that anyone can be anyone. We don’t have to endure the all too common tokenism with race or gender. Each character has 4 of the skills above, each rated either great or good. Plus, each has 2 special abilities, but you can only use one on each quest. These abilities come with a cost but benefit the team as a whole – for instance the ability to revive someone or the ability to rewind time and repeat an event. (Hopefully learning from your failure and choosing a skill that doesn’t leave you hanging upside down from a vine.)
 
The ability cards also enable you to track your life points and when you flip them, the reverse side has another special ability that can be used by your ghost to spitefully try to thwart the remaining group members.
 
Game Play
Once your quest is chosen and the appropriate number of encounters laid out, face down, in the winding path of your choice, you are ready to embark on your journey.
 
You reveal the first encounter and work together to decide which brave soul is best equipped to go forward and resolve this event. There are four possible entry points to each encounter, each with four possible skills you could use. But, as you venture deeper into the forest the decisions become less straightforward – you need to weigh up not just who has the skills but also which of you is still strong enough. Choose wrong and one of you will die, possibly transforming into a shade who will hex your party. What use is epic strength when tripping over an exposed tree root could kill you?
 
Once you have agreed upon your action, you use the website or a printed version of the story book, find the number shown to reveal the next part of the story… and your fate…
 
You could lose life points, gain artefacts or items which you can cash in to help you on your quest or hang on to as treasure to sweeten your victory. Additionally your status may change – becoming sluggish will slow you down whilst becoming composed will improve your levels of guile.
 
You wend your way on your chosen path, meeting each new challenge with a combination of skills and abilities, hopefully all surviving, if a little bruised, to tell the tale!
 
Variants
Each game begins with a quest: the Quest can be randomly selected or you can choose carefully to increase your chances. Each quest comes with one artefact or item and some make success easier than others. For instance, the Ancient Amulet allows you to restore up to 3 health for each of the group. Equally, you can increase the difficulty – start at The Dragon’s Mouth – not only are the steps a challenge for anyone with dancers’ knees but you gain a random item to start. And, if your random item choosing is anything like my dice rolling, then you’re screwed.
 
As I was travelling to St Ives I found a game with
5 possible quests
3 difficulty levels
36 Encounters
Each encounter had 4 sides
Each side had 4 skills
Each skill had 4 possible levels of competency from Fair to Epic
There were 12 possible statuses that affect your skills
Each character had 2 abilities to choose from
Each dead character could choose to invoke a ghostly ability or not
Quests, skills, cats, kits … I have literally no idea how many adventurers were travelling to Saint Ives but I do know this. There are an epic number of variants, and I can’t see how I could ever exhaust this game.
 
Come along to a Cards or Die event and try it out yourself.
Forest of Fate
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Games for a laugh

Board games can be a serious business. Try circulating at an event, trying to capture photos of people having a great time playing games and you’ll soon see: the furrowed brows; the intense examination of a hand of cards; the co-operative players desperately trying to escape The Curse of The Temple. It’s all fun and games till someone loses a die.
 
In this week’s blog I want to look at the lighter side of board gaming, focusing on 6 games that will make you laugh.
 
The Cheese Touch
How well do you really know these people – your family, friends and fellow gamers? Thanks to the Cheese Touch, you are about to find out. As you move around the board you have to complete tasks like- miming an action using the adverb on the card (e.g. lazily), the player whose turn it is has 5 chances to get the correct answer; there’s Yes or No – choose a player who you think will give the same answer as you; Who Said What? – match responses with players or Great Minds Think Alike – reveal identical answers to win. Succeed in these tasks and you will be rewarded with movement towards the end of the board… but fail and you will have The Cheese Touch… To win the game you must get round the board first and be free of the cheese touch!
 
Even if you never read the books, didn’t watch the film or don’t believe that cheese is inherently comical you will still be doing your level best to avoid the cheese touch and laughing as you do!
 
Cobra Paw
The first thing you need to know about Cobra Paw is that the tiles are called Clawfuku – I’ll let you work on the pronunciation yourself. Roll the dice and identify the clawfuku which matches the symbols shown on the dice. Grab it quick with your stealthy ninja skills, before anyone else. First to 6 (or 7 in a two player game) wins!
But be careful- just because a clawfuku is in front of you does not mean it is yours. At every roll of the dice, they are all up for grabs. You need ‘eyes in your arse’ to win this game!
Despite your temptation to pronounce clawfuku in an aggressive manner – the divit of diplomacy will avert any unpleasantness. In the case of a close call, whichever player has their claw in the divit is the winner of that particular clawfuku.
The game pieces are chunky and colourful, delightfully tactile and the game itself is quick to learn and play and endlessly entertaining.
Anomia
A quick fire game – like a powered up version of snap. Match the symbols then call out an example from the category on the other person’s card to win the pair. Like so many classic games, it sounds so easy. Then as it gathers speed you realise that you don’t know any animals at all and the only TV shows you remember went off air in the 1970s. Or, worse still the only word you can think of is flatworm and you’re not even sure what that is.
Wild cards add more mayhem by allowing you to match on two symbols. So in the one pictured you could have a match with 2 crosses, 2 zigzags or 1 cross and 1 zigzag. Frankly after ‘a’ glass of wine that can be a challenge too far – if in doubt shout flatworm and hope for the best.
Animal Ailments
A mime in two acts. Animal Ailments demands that you successfully communicate which animal you are. Then through the medium of interpretive dance, charades or simply with the power of your mind – communicate your ailment. You gain cards for miming excellence and for understanding other people’s interesting interpretations! Can you recognise a hungry tiger, a camera shy kangaroo or a snail who is (understandably) scared of birds?
The cards also have power ups, giveaways, extra turns and other abilities which make the game more chaotic and entertaining. And, of course there’s a timer – everything’s funnier when you are under pressure!
A thoroughly entertaining and ridiculous game. We love it!
Quirk and Quirk Legends
Quirk is like Happy Families (if the families were on crack). To win quirks (sets of three cards) you must act out or make the sound of the quirk you are trying to complete. Quirk Legends has the added twist of allowing you to count up how many goodies and baddies you end up with! Both games include tactic and skip cards which allow you to complete actions like – stealing quirks, stealing cards or blocking others’ actions.
The illustrations are lovely too. I particularly like those in Quirk legends. I’ve got a soft spot for the T-Rex though – I’m not convinced they’re a baddy!
It’s obviously great for kids as it is easy to learn and it appeals to their sense of silliness. Recapturing that silliness makes for an entertaining game for adults too. I went for years without rolling down grassy hills and when I had children I rediscovered the joy of it. It’s something I won’t have the chutzpah to do for much longer as I risk embarrassing myself and the children. This game is perfect for giving you permission to be as daft as you like – children or no children.
A thoroughly enjoyable game. In this instance the lack of timer makes it more entertaining as you force your opponent to repeatedly impersonate a wizard whilst sincerely claiming you have no idea which card she’s after. Make ’em earn their quirks!
Verbositi
A word game that has endless possibilities for creative hilarity.
Read more about it in my recent review of it here.
So if you are game for a laugh and you want to challenge your pelvic floor as well as your brain give one of these a go!

Come along to a Cards or Die event and try them out.
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Don your Deerstalker! A guide to detective games.

Whether you prefer to drink real ale, drive classic cars and shout at Junior Detectives, wear a deerstalker and have sharp cheekbones, or exercise your little grey cells (and if you didn’t read that in a Belgian accent you’ve let yourself down) – you will certainly enjoy these detective games. In our house we love a bit of intense sleuthing and here are some of our choices…
 
Cluedo
Classics are classics for a reason and Cluedo is no exception. It is yet another Waddingtons Leeds success story. But, unlike Monopoly and despite the macabre theme, it doesn’t inspire actual murder. Internationally successful to this day, the game is widely known as Clue abraod. A reissue of the game in 2008 saw it attempt to align itself with modern culture – you can find out more in Richard Alleyne’s article here. I don’t want to get involved with first names and modern weaponry though, Cluedo for me is about embracing the theme, having a warm milky drink before bed while I peruse and ponder the clues. I still love our vintage version best.
 
There are three female characters to choose from which is a boon. Although since my daughter adopted this as one of her favourites, I never get to be Miss Scarlet anymore. I am often relegated to the buxom and comforting steadiness of Mrs White and spend the game internally creating a salacious back story – she wasn’t always this matronly you know!
 
At the time when Cluedo first appeared in the mid-forties it was an important alternative to the roll and move games which were so prevalent. Even as a child in the late 70s / early 80s I was not so spoilt for choice as we are now. Cluedo offered a relief from the day long unpleasantness of Monopoly or the inordinately (and unjustifiably) long games of Frustration and Ludo. I enjoyed it then and now because it uses your brain. Being able to accurately deduce who commited the murder, where and with what implement is still very satisfying. Even when you don’t win, you are invested in the outcome – often the reveal is followed by a comparing of notes and discussion of how close or far off other players were. It is that which gives Cluedo continuing appeal.
 
Cluedo Card Game
Cluedo but portable? Yes please. The game works well as a card game and sticks reasonably closely to the original. In this version you must use your deduction skills to ascertain the Suspect, the Destination and the Vehicle they are making their getaway in. Action cards determine what players may do on their turns. The addition of destination markers which are all visible help to maintain the mechanic of moving to a room to make your accusation.
 
There is also a ‘one against all’ variation. One player assumes the role of the fugitive and must form an escape plan while the detectives must thwart the villains plans before they can make good their escape and time runs out.
 
I love the artwork on the cards, especially the old fashioned modes of escape like the seaplane! All of the cards – photographs and illustrations – have been given a sepia, aged tone. This makes some of the seemingly random destinations all the more enjoyable – Miss Scarlet might have hopped on her hot air balloon bound for Loch Ness, Alton Towers or perhaps even Blackpool Tower! It is a fun variant of Cluedo and easy to take to the pub, so everyone’s a winner!
 
221B Baker Street
221B Baker Street has 75 different cases to solve (if you buy the most recent version). Cases vary in complexity as well as making different demands of the detectives; for some crimes you need to uncover the motive, killer and weapon while others ask for cause of death, how the victim died or other more obscure details of the case. You start off at Baker Street and then make your way round the board to different locations, collecting and solving clues as you go. You can only read the clue once and there is a time limit of 30 seconds and may not refer back to it – so the notes you take are vital!
 
When you believe you have solved the mystery you return to 221B Baker street and announce your theory. If you are correct you are victorious and the game ends. Fail and you are suspended from duty – effective immediately – you do not even get to share your notes with fellow officers.
 
You are able to seal off locations to hide valuable clues or mislead other players. These are fairly easy to unlock and although you are only allowed one key and one Scotland Yard card to seal and unlock locations, they are easy to replace. It is not a feature that we often use when we play, because of the “actual murder” thing (see above!).
 
While it can seem slow to start, the game soon picks up pace. I enjoy the problem solving and deduction as well as the opportunity to take opium and play the violin erratically.
 
We enjoy it despite the fact the children find some of the clues too obscure. We usually start out individually and end up in some sort of co-operative game where we work together to solve the crime, or we visit different locations and swap clues. I’m basically quite conflict averse, so we don’t enforce the 30 second rule, or use a much longer time. Not only would it make the game more difficult, but I can’t imagine a scenario in which one of my children would not attempt to kill the other with the clue book rolled up around a lead pipe, in the dining room, when their 30 seconds was up and they ‘HAVEN’T EVEN READ IT ONCE’. I’m a strong believer in house rules and am not a stickler for the printed ones. Games are about having fun and as long as all rules are pre-agreed by the group so that everyone can access and enjoy the game that’s what matters most.
 
Mr Jack
Mr Jack is a great little 2 player asymmetric detective game. The Inspector employs Holmes, Watson and Toby the dog to track down Jack the Ripper. It is short on diversity of characters but it has many plus points. We took it on holiday with us and played it a lot.
 
Inspector Morse
Unlike 221B there are only 9 variations to play here (3 cases with 3 question cards each). So it has a clearly limited life on your shelves. Lucky for you I bought it so you don’t have to!
 
You begin by reading the case book but make careful notes as anytime you want to look at it again it will cost you 10 points (each player starts with 500 promotion points). The object of the game is to move around the board solving clues so that you are able to correctly answer the six questions from the question card. Locations contain clue cards which once read are replaced at the bottom of the pile and if you are unlucky enough to draw the same clue twice that’s just tough – you don’t get to swap it for another!
 
As you move around the board you also encounter difficulties and positive adding a (possibly unnecessary) element of luck to the game. The square may cause you to lose or gain promotion points at random; move to certain locations or squares or move other players. You can move around the board in a variety of ways though.
 
There are two endings to choose from which as a group you can decide on at the beginning. You may either return to Morse’s office with your theory, at which point all players hand in their notes sheets which are scored (plus points for correct deductions, minus points for incorrect or missing answers) or, return to Morse’s office and see if you are correct. If you have solved the case then the game ends but if you have not then the remaining detectives slog on while you wait in the pub with an increasingly warm real ale for them.
 
Despite the luck element this is an enjoyable game, especially if you enjoyed the TV series. Relish the opportunity to say ‘Lewis’ in a suitably angry or disparaging tone every time someone else lands on a bad square! Best played in the pub with a real ale – it’s where you do your best thinking after all.
 
Get Adler
Get Adler is a brilliant, fun game. In the first half the agents are searching for Adler and in the second half Adler tries to escape while the agents try to catch him. Particularly good for larger groups as it plays up to 9 people. Mechanics wise it combines guess who with fast paced strategy!
I have reviewed Get Adler previously – you can read more here.
 
And I couldn’t write a blog on sleuthing without featuring a Sherlock gif, could I?
Join us for games for a Cards or Die event.
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Where are we now? Mental health and my small business.

Over a year since our launch and most company directors have to publish a yearly review. But I’m in charge so it’s a blog post! This feels self indulgent and I wasn’t sure whether to write this but then I thought – that’s just the mental health talking – so I’m persisting anyway.
 
Taking time to reflect.
Since February, not only has the weather been appalling but I’ve also been home with a poorly teenager. Now, if I stay in the house too long, I start to go stir crazy. But I’ve ended up stuck indoors far more than I would like and recently, I had a particularly challenging week. I could feel my grip on my mind slipping through my fingers; everything seemed bleak. I do battle with with my mental health at the best of times but I felt so negative for so much of the time that I was just drained. It all seemed like too much effort.
 
My partner came to the rescue and worked from home to give me some much needed mental and physical space away from the house and I went out for the day. I decided that what I would do with this valuable time was reflect. So, I took myself to a cafe and spent the day just thinking and planning. I made myself start by writing a list of achievements, then I wrote down where I wanted to be and how I might get there (in small steps). When you are used to voices that tell you how thoroughly rubbish and inept you are, and when you happily subjugate your own needs to those of others (which with a poorly child and ailing parents there is ample opportunity for) then that task becomes a lot harder than it should be*.
*And there’s an example right there. One of the first things I learned on my CBT course was the toxicity of ‘should’. ‘Should’ is a massive stick to beat yourself with. So let me rephrase
… that task becomes a lot harder.
I have decided that each month I am going to make myself complete this process. It’s in my diary, planned in advance with a space (large) to record achievements and goals to evaluate. Even better I made up an acronym – it’s a CAFE day: Celebrating Achievement and Future Enterprise. The day centres on these things, it must be in a cafe and there must be cake. I am a valued employee and a great boss.
Key Achievements
Despite staring at an empty page for a good while, once I started listing achievements I actually had to acknowledge that I have achieved something. My biggest achievement over the past year has been to persevere. In the face of challenge, doubt and sometimes difficult times I have persevered. I have learnt a lot in this past year and I have made mistakes. One of the liberating things has been taking a step back and learning from mistakes rather than berating myself continually; for the most part I have been kind to myself. Don’t get me wrong, I am a kind person where other people are concerned but very often I am not so kind to myself. It can be difficult to like myself when I’m not being kind, not least because that unkind part of me highlights and magnifies my faults for me. It’s like being trapped in some kind of hellish cycle.
 
It seems a long time since I was planning my launch event at The Abbey Inn last March. And that’s another important lesson that’s reiterated in CBT- reflect on your achievements regularly. Don’t let them slip past you into some homogenous blob labelled ‘I’m sure I must have done a good thing once’.
On a practical level some of my key business achievements this year have been:
  • building a twitter following from about 30 to 1599.
  • built my own website which now has actual subscribers!
  • setting up a facebook page which now has 395 followers and my posts reach 3500 people
  • writing a weekly blog
  • learning about marketing
  • learning to do my own accounts
  • getting regular bookings at pubs and cafes
  • doing a festival, weddings, WI events, Girl Guide meetings, corporate training, and team building in schools
  • making a bespoke game for a charity to use in their training
  • and more bookings coming in all the time
And personally, in my saner, more rational moments I know that I am setting an example for my children; that I am a good, kind and honest parent and that I have done the best by my own parents too.
 
Dreaming Big
I also took some time to consider my ideals. ‘I’ll know I’ve made it when… ‘ sort of things. I want a business that’s big enough to have staff. Specifically, I want an accountant to do all the maths stuff. I want to expand and employ a small staff on a decent wage so that I can do even more events and reach more people. Really, I want to bring people together with board games – whether that’s strangers at events, or families and friends who struggle to take enough time out of their busy lives to properly connect with each other. So, I want a business that makes a decent profit so that I can pay my share of the bills and see a bit more of the world whilst sharing the board gaming love as widely as I can.
 
I’d like to say that I’ll know I’ve made it when I no longer worry that I’m an enormous life-sucking failure. But, even for big dreams that’s a whopper!
 
You can probably deduce from this list that I’m not the most ambitious person in the world. We’ll probably never know how much of that is my natural inclination and how much is attributable to my mental head stuff. So it’s probably not worth worrying about. (Makes mental note to definitely not worry about this. At all. Not even a bit.)
 
Goals we can achieve
One of the most important goals has got to be better self care. I need to do my physio exercises, eat well and look after my mental health. All easier said than done. Once I get to the top of that helter skelter, I easily and almost comfortably descend into food avoidance, cruelty to self and avoidance of anything that will make me feel better on the basis that I’m not worth the time or I haven’t the energy. I know that self care will always be on any list of goals I set myself, hopefully over time it will become easier to accept that I am worth the effort.
 
I’ve had loads of valuable support from other small businesses and wherever I can I try to support others. I want to continue to do this and continue to build those relationships face to face and via social media which have been so important to me in this last year.
 
My aims for the business at the moment are to increase my turnover by getting more corporate bookings, booking in more weddings, a festival or two, maybe some parties too. To increase my reach on social media and to stick to a games budget. No mean feat that last one – if you’re struggling with that you might enjoy this blog.
 
 
Next Steps
My small achievable goals; I worked in teaching long enough to know that goals are not enough – they need to be broken down into discrete achievable steps. The type of targets I set myself for the day reflect where I’m at with my mental health. For days where the list starts…
  • physio
  • eat breakfast
  • shower
  • brush teeth
  • make and drink a cup of tea
…well, those days are not my finest. But right now the short term list which me and my boss will review at the end of the month on CAFE day looks more like this:
  • Do more physio (that’s always there!)
  • Increase Facebook likes to 500
  • Increase twitter followers to 1600
  • secure 1 corporate booking
  • secure 1 schools booking
  • secure 1 meeting to show off my bespoke board game to a potential client
  • keep writing a weekly blog
  • keep accounts up to date
  • get the games admin up to date
  • try to get crowned #QueenOf Board Games!
I’ve tried to make it achievable; a mixture of keeping doing the things, and doing new things. If in doubt I just keep doing the thing… and we’ll see when it’s reviewed at the next CAFE day. I know one thing, I’ll make sure my boss is kind to me.
 
Click on the image below for a link to more Katie Abey motivational goodness.